My Madness: Penn State Basketball
On March 16th, the Penn State men’s basketball team will take to the court to face Texas A&M in the opening round of the NCAA March Madness basketball tournament. To many, this game is merely one of forty-eight in the tournament, a fleeting moment in the grand scheme of college basketball. But for me, this game represents so much more. It’s a story of perseverance, a journey of ups and downs that has shaped my love for Penn State football’s ugly sister. It’s a brief respite from the stresses of reality, a few hours where the only thing that matters is the sound of sneakers screeching across the hardwood. A beacon of hope and a catalyst for dreams that we might be the team cutting down the nets at the end of the tournament. As I prepare Thursday, I’d like to take a moment and share how this game and this team became way too important to a 28 year old man.
The Beginning
On September 16, 2000, my Dad drove my twin brother Adam and me to our grandmother’s house to watch the Pitt vs. Penn State football game. While I can’t recall the exact channel the game was on, I know that Grandma had it, and we didn’t. So we went to her house. I was only 5 years old at the time but already a passionate Steelers fan, as all young boys were from the Pittsburgh area. I had backyard fantasies of catching the game winning pass wearing Black and Gold, but I hadn’t given much thought to the college game.
As we settled in for the main event that day, Dad explained some of the history to us. This was a historic and bitter rivalry that had been brewing for over a century, with each team vying for state supremacy and bragging rights. There were even rumors at the time that this would be the final game in the series due to contractual disagreements. As Dad finished his tale and the game was about to kick-off, Adam quickly declared his allegiance to Pitt, prompting me, his lifelong adversary, to respond with a knee-jerk “I’m rooting for Penn State.”
It’s not hyperbole to say that this moment changed my life forever. Had this moment gone differently, I would most likely be a completely different person, with a completely different life. But it didn’t go differently. I chose Penn State that day and every day since. And the team welcomed me aboard with my first dose of heartbreak as Pitt beat Penn State 12–0.
Little did I know that by choosing Penn State, I inadvertently positioned myself as the antagonist of all my friends and classmates, as most kids from the Pittsburgh suburbs were loyal Pitt fans. This natural rivalry strengthened my passion exponentially. Penn State had to win, or I would face harassment and mockery the next day.
In the early days of my fandom, Penn State’s football team was struggling despite a history of success in the previous decades. On the other hand, Pitt’s basketball team was surging into a national powerhouse, finishing in the top 10 of the final AP rankings in 2002 and 2003. Then in the 2004 season, Pitt started off the year winning 18 consecutive games. I still remember the chants in the 3rd grade cafeteria: “Twelve and O, Twelve and O, Twelve and O!!!!” Followed by “Thirteen and O, Thirteen and O, Thirteen and O!!!!!” This pattern continued until Pitt finally lost their 19th game of the season.
Meanwhile, Penn State basketball was historically bad. In that same season, they only won 9 out of 28 games, and the following season they only won 7. Adding to the disappointment, none of the games were televised on the few channels available at my parents’ house. Despite these setbacks, I remained dedicated to following the team. During each game, I would sit in my dad’s office at the family desktop, refreshing the ESPN play-by-play every minute or so to stay up-to-date with the action. Sometimes, I would click refresh and nothing had changed, but other times new information would pour onto the screen.
“Geary Claxton made Dunk”
“Danny Morrissey made Three Pointer Jumper. Assisted by Ben Luber.”
“Michigan State Defense Rebound. End of Second Half.”
As I clicked away, refreshing the play-by-play, I fell in love with being a Penn State basketball fan. Despite the team’s struggles and lack of attention compared to the wildly popular football program, I found the fandom to be more personal and meaningful for me. It was as if I was part of a secret club, rooting for a team that others had overlooked. While the football team had millions of fans across the globe, I took pride in being one of the few who stood by the basketball team through thick and thin.
Into the Madness
In 2007, when I was in 7th grade, there was a sign that the momentum around the Penn State basketball program could begin to change. Talor Battle, a 5'10" kid from Albany, New York, committed to the program. As the 92nd best high school recruit in the country, Battle was the top recruit to attend Penn State in many seasons, and his arrival brought renewed hope to the team. He quickly made an impact, averaging more than 10 points per game during his freshman year, and helping the team finish just one game shy of .500.
The following season, everything began to click for Penn State. They started off strong with a 17–5 record and a clear path towards the NCAA tournament. However, a string of five losses in their next eight games put them on the brink of missing out yet again. Fortunately, it felt like Penn State still had a chance to save the season as they took on number 23 ranked Illinois.
I vividly recall the excitement I felt for this game. It was set to air on ESPN, so I wouldn’t have to refresh the play-by-play on my computer. The game tipped off quite late, but my parents understood its significance to me and allowed me to stay up on a school night. To make sure I wouldn’t miss anything, my dad even taped the game. The game itself was a nail-biter, with both teams constantly trading leads. However, in the final seconds of the game, Illinois was up by one point when they missed a crucial free throw. Jamelle Cornley grabbed the rebound and passed the ball to Talor Battle. Battle dribbled down the court, seemingly trapped by defenders. But in a moment of brilliance, he squeezed between two of them, lobbed the ball high off the glass, and watched as it bounced through the net. PENN STATE WINS!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_dKPobPX3Ng&t=22s
Yet, apparently this win was not enough for the selection committee to put Penn State into the tournament and instead of playing at the Big Dance, Penn State was once again on the outside looking in, a member of Sports Illustrated’s Biggest snubs of theNCAA tournament bracket.
Penn State’s performance hit rock bottom the following season, as they managed only three wins in Big Ten play. As Talor Battle geared up for his final season with the team, it seemed unlikely that he and his talented teammates would be able to finally secure a spot in the coveted March Madness tournament.
The Penn State basketball rollercoaster is full of surprises, and 2011 was no exception. The team was winning big games, and Talor Battle was hitting clutch shots. Freshman Tim Frazier proved to be the perfect complement to Battle’s game, allowing him to work off the ball and catch and shoot. And then, on March 13, 2011, the moment every Penn State basketball fan had been waiting for: Penn State’s name was called in the NCAA tournament, ending a 10-year drought.
I was 16 at the time, and I don’t think I fully got to appreciate the moment. I didn’t let it soak in. I didn’t understand that there are moments in life that are more about the process than the outcome. I wasn’t happy to be there. I was relieved that we weren’t missing out. And when the game actually began, my heart was filled with bitterness and a desire for revenge. Revenge for the years of being overlooked and underestimated. Revenge for the times I had sat in front of a computer screen, anxiously refreshing the play-by-play, hoping for a win that would never come.
The March Madness spirit was in full force during the game, with Penn State and Temple trading leads back and forth. As the game was winding down with just 28 seconds left, Temple took a three-point lead and Penn State inbounded the ball to Tim Frazier. But everyone in the arena knew that the ball would ultimately find its way into the hands of Talor Battle. Despite Temple’s defender attempting to deny Battle the ball, he managed to break free with only 14 seconds remaining. He caught the ball roughly 30 feet from the basket and sank an incredible three-pointer. I jumped up in jubilation. I couldn’t believe it. My favorite player had saved the day. Tie game.
After Battle’s shot went in, Temple called a timeout to draw up an offensive play to try to win the game. Their thirty second timeout felt like a lifetime to me. I remember standing and staring at the screen as my Dad laid on the ground beside me. I remember the mentally praying and begging to anyone that would listen. Please don’t let them score.
Whatever play Temple drew up did not work. It ended with Juan Fernandez 20 feet from the basket, trapped with a defender in his grill. In desperation, he switched pivot feet and tossed up a prayer. It went in. Game over. Season over. Madness over.
My heart sank into my stomach. I yelled out “that’s a travel!” My Dad, not known for his basketball expertise, mentioned that he thought it was a clean play (he was probably right). I screamed back at him and was sent to my room to cool down.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C7lv4NBP428
Talor Battle graduated that season, Penn State’s coach randomly quit. The team fell back into the abyss.
Joining the Cult
In October of 2012, I sat down with my family and Grandma for dinner. I don’t remember it that well, but I’m pretty sure that Grandma cooked her famous ribs and scalloped potatoes. She knew we loved this meal and never missed a chance to make her grandkids happy. I didn’t know it at the time, but this would be one of the last family meals we would have with Grandma. She lost a sudden battle with cancer a few months later.
As we finished our meal, my Dad handed me a large envelope that had arrived in the mail. It was from Penn State, the only school I had applied to. I knew that my admission was far from guaranteed — I hadn’t exactly been a star student — so the stakes felt incredibly high as I tore open the envelope. And then, there it was: “Congratulations, Nathan…”
My parents and Grandma were overjoyed. I was so relieved. I had been daydreaming about being a Nittany Lion for 13 years and now it was a reality.
My parents were incredibly supportive of my Penn State dream. My Mom made sure I had a wardrobe full of Penn State T-shirts, while my Dad took me to a football game every season. I remember every game vividly, from the awe-inspiring atmosphere of 100,000 fans cheering for the same team at my first game against Minnesota, to the bone-chilling cold of the Michigan State game where grown men huddled in the bathroom for warmth.
Then, on September 7th, 2013 I attended my first Penn State football game as a student. It was a surreal experience for me. The energy in the student section is amazing and you truly feel like you are a part of something bigger than yourself. Yet, it was also a confusing time to be a Penn State football fan. The program was embroiled in what could be considered the biggest scandal in college football history — the cover-up of the sexual abuse of young boys by former assistant coach Jerry Sandusky. While none of the players on the team at the time had anything to do with the scandal, there is no doubt that a toxic culture surrounding the program was partially responsible. Even worse, many fans were in denial of the role that Joe Paterno and other key Penn State figures had played.
Meanwhile, the basketball team remained largely unnoticed and unsuccessful. Unlike the football games, where fans had to camp out for a week just to have a chance to sit in the front row, I could show up to every Penn State basketball game just 45 minutes before tip-off and easily secure a front-row seat.
I attended almost every game while I was a Penn State student, but they were really bad. Despite having a few standout players each year, they never seemed to be serious contenders for making it to the NCAA Tournament. Nonetheless, I still cherish some fond memories of those games. One time, we managed to beat Ohio State and the entire crowd rushed the court in celebration. I was jumping up and down with a group of players when I accidentally dropped my phone. It got trampled on by the crowd, and the screen was completely destroyed. Worth it. Sorry Aaron Kraft.
A random side note about my time at Penn State is that my senior year Penn State played Pitt for the first time since that fateful day in 2000. I traveled to Pittsburgh with my college roommates to attend the game, and it was the most excited I had ever been for a sporting event. Ironically, it was also the first time I was visiting Emily, a Pitt student I had met while doing a summer teaching internship. At the time we were just an extended summer fling but I knew I had feelings for her that went beyond that. It was tough to balance these two experiences at once. I remember walking to the stadium the day of the game, I was so excited that I kept accidently walking way ahead of her. She didn’t care about the game at all and went home before it even began.
The game didn’t unfold as I had imagined; Penn State lost and to top it off, I suffered a terrible sunburn. I was so upset after the game that I cancelled my plans to go out to dinner with Emily. Luckily, she saw past my grumpiness and now we have been together for almost 7 years.
The Black Cloud
The year following my graduation from Penn State, the basketball team had their best season since 2011. It was an exhilarating season with some unforgettable victories, including three against Ohio State, two of which were achieved in spectacular fashion. I’ll save you the details of those games but share the links for anyone interested in walking down memory lane.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hZ0hZmyvBX8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oIZbgKdUcxQ
As a first-year teacher, my days were often filled with non-stop lesson planning, grading, and classroom management. But no matter how busy I was, I always made time to watch every basketball game of the season. For me, these games were a much-needed escape from the daily chaos of teaching. It was a chance to forget about my lesson plans and the never-ending to-do list, and focus on something that could completely capture my attention.
Sometimes, after a particularly challenging day at school, I would find myself eagerly counting down the minutes until tip-off. As the game began, I would be transported to a different world where only one thing mattered: winning. Ironically, these games often induced just as much stress as a classroom full of children. I remember watching a game one Saturday and joking to my friends “man, I can’t wait for Monday.”
The games were extra stressful that season because Penn State had a legitimate chance at making it to the tournament. When your team is on the bubble, every game feels dire. I don’t enjoy those games. I’m incredibly anxious the entire time. But I wouldn’t trade the experience for anything.
At the end of the season, KenPom, a basketball analytics website, ranked Penn State the 19th best team in the country. Despite this, Penn State was kept out of the NCAA Tournament. 68 teams make the tournament each year. It felt like there was a Black Cloud hanging over the program that kept us out of the tournament.
Once again, the next season Penn State began to slide. Penn State lost more than half of its games and never came anywhere close to the NCAA Tournament. (While I’m skipping the dramatics of some seasons, I should note that these games still played a substantial role in my life. No matter the circumstances or the success of the season, I find myself planning my calendar around the game schedule. Sometimes, the summer months are a bit relieving because there are no sporting events to orbit my life around).
But then something magical happened during the 2019–2020 season. Penn State started the season 12–3. A team predominantly built out of players from Philadelphia took down a ranked Iowa team at the Palestra to conclude a five game win streak that would propel them into the Top 10 ranked teams in college basketball. There’s a perfect moment captured of Lamar Stevens, screaming into the camera “This is my city! This is my f***ing city!!”
Lamar alone made the team so easy to love. As the senior leader, he had experienced the program’s highs and lows, turning down opportunities for better programs to stick with Penn State. Watching him play was an emotional experience, as his passion and intensity ignited the fans’ love for the game. It felt like he had a personal mission to end Penn State’s tournament drought, and his determination was contagious (foreshadowing). Words cannot fully express the impact Lamar Stevens had on the Penn State program, and his unwavering commitment left everything on the court in every game he played.
Penn State ended the season with a three game skid but was still a projected 6 seed in the tournament. I felt like I was in a daze. I couldn’t believe it was finally happening. It all felt surreal. After nine consecutive seasons of sitting on the sidelines, Penn State was going to the tournament.
Then came Covid and with it the cancellation of all of March Madness. Lamar Stevens’ Penn State career was over before it even had a chance to compete in the tournament. It was a gut punch for the entire team and for fans like me who had waited so long to see Penn State make it to the Big Dance.
I want to preface this by acknowledging the real suffering that Covid-19 has caused people all around the world. This just isn’t a blog post about that. This is way too many words about a basketball program I care way too much about. That’s all it is, don’t take it too serious.
Eventually the world found a way to forward and Lamar Stevens went onto the NBA, where he continues to play to this day.
But once again, the Penn State rollercoaster began its descent. In the off-season, news broke that Penn State’s head coach Pat Chambers had made a racially insensitive comment to one of the players, leading to his resignation. Most of Penn State’s talented players subsequently left the program, leaving behind only Freshman Seth Lundy and Forward Myles Dread as the major players.
The mass departure of talent led to another sub .500 season for Penn State in 2021 under interim coach Jim Ferry. I was actually in Taiwan for the majority of the season which led to me watching some games on some really weird time schedules (Taiwan is exactly 12 hours ahead). When Penn State was playing its final games of the year in the Big Ten Tournament (not to be confused with the illustrious NCAA Tournament), I snuck away from my school and walked through the streets trying to watch the game. But I kept running into students who were leaving early or arriving late and I could tell they were very confused about what I was doing. Eventually I ducked into a store that sold washing machines and hid in a corner to watch the closing seconds of the second round game against Wisconsin. I tried to not cheer too loudly as Penn State mounted an incredible comeback, but they eventually fell short and the season ended. I walked back to school and made up a dumb excuse about my departure. The truth was too embarrassing.
A New Chapter
Penn State started a promising new chapter last season with the hiring of Micah Shrewsberry, a highly regarded NBA basketball expert who quickly earned the respect of his peers in the Big Ten. Simultaneously, I was embarking on a new chapter of my own in Baltimore, and I couldn’t help feeling optimistic about both developments. Baltimore felt like a natural fit for me, just as Shrewsberry felt like the ideal candidate for Penn State’s basketball program.
But the new era quickly proved to be the same story for the Penn State basketball program. It didn’t seem to matter who the players were or who was coaching, it was always the same problems. Penn State could not win a close game. In just that season Penn State lost 9 games by 6 points or fewer.
And with all of that history, that brings us to this season. A Penn State team with more seniors and experience than any other team in all of college basketball. A Penn State team led by Jalen Pickett, a second year transfer from Sienna, but a team that still has roots in the players that stuck around. Seth Lundy has consistently been the best defender on the team and has the highest 3 point shooting percentage in the Big Ten. Myles Dread, may not fill up the box sheet at the same rate, has proven to be the vocal leader of the team.
Penn State started off non-conference play easily on pace to make the NCAA Tournament. They quickly proved to be one of the best three point shooting teams in the country and while I was exercising caution, I was feeling really good about their chances to make the tournament at the end of 2022.
Then they lost 8 of their next 11 games. This was disappointing but not surprising. Penn State basketball has a history of teasing fans with moments of promise, only to falter in the end, failing to maintain the necessary level of consistency to make the NCAA Tournament.
As Penn State sat at 5–9 in Big Ten play entering their Valentines Day game against Illinois, they knew that they would have to win at least 5 of their last 6 games to even have a chance to make the tournament. While I hadn’t given up on the team, I felt emotionally distant. I even missed watching the game on Valentine’s Day because I had to play in my own basketball game. Jalen Pickett scored 41 points in that game. While that is a truly impressive individual accomplishment, it still didn’t bring much hope that Penn State would make the tournament. I was still pretty bummed to miss the game.
Next, Penn State beat a pretty bad Minnesota team, in a form that didn’t inspire much confidence. But in sports, a win-is-a-win and Penn State just had to keep winning. And then they beat Ohio State and with just three games remaining in the season, the team’s prospects began to look brighter once again. If they could secure two more victories out of the remaining three games, they would have a legitimate shot at making it to the NCAA tournament.
The next game was against Rutgers on February 26th. Penn State dominated the game early on, and as I sat in my living room, I began to daydream about writing this post, about making it to the tournament, about what it would feel like to watch Penn State play in the opening round. As I daydreamed, Penn State continued to dominate, leading by as much as 19 in the second half. At one point, I checked ESPN and they projected that there was a 98% chance that Penn State would win the game.
Then they collapsed. Despite Jalen Pickett’s previous scoring efforts, he stopped shooting altogether, and the rest of the team appeared lost. They failed to make a single basket for the remaining nine minutes, allowing Rutgers to take the lead with only a minute and twenty-one seconds left on the clock. Rutgers maintained their lead until the end, resulting in a devastating loss for Penn State. My friend Charlie, an equally religious Pitt fan, texted me after the game and said “that might be the worst loss I’ve ever seen given the context.”
Penn State now needed to win its final two regular season games to make the NCAA Tournament. On March 1, they played against a ranked Northwestern team in Evanston. It was a late tip that kept me up way past my bedtime on a school night. The two teams were essentially tied for most of the game and it went into overtime. Then in the remaining seconds of overtime Evan Mahafey skied high for an offensive rebound, threw the ball to Andrew Funk, who then whipped it to Cam Wynter. Wynter drained a three point basket to give Penn State the lead with 0.5 seconds left. Northwestern missed their hail mary. Penn State wins.
The final game of the regular season between Penn State and Maryland was a critical one, as Penn State’s hopes for postseason success depended on winning. Despite being thoroughly outplayed throughout the game, the team refused to give up. This was a program that had faced disappointment for over two decades, yet this time, something seemed to have changed. Eventually, Penn State clawed its way back into the game. As the clock ticked down to just 18 seconds left, Penn State found itself in possession of the ball, trailing by a single point.
Jalen Pickett took the ball up the court. He got stuck. He broke free. But then he got stuck again and heaved the ball out to Seth Lundy. Seth Lundy was the kid who stuck with the program through it all. The kid who had three different coaches throughout his time at Penn State but no matter who shuffled in he always remained loyal to the Blue and White. And with the three seconds left and the season on the line, Seth Lundy shot a three point shot that could change the trajectory of Penn State basketball.
And he missed it. It’s a story that almost writes itself at this point. A story of hope and the eventual despair. As if Penn State basketball was some side story in a Lemony Snicket’s book.
But this time the ending was different. We got a lucky bounce. The missed shot fell directly into the hands of Cam Wynter. He quickly grabbed the ball and tossed it back through the hoop as time expired. Penn State wins.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AfM3cnLCbAc&t=2s
Yet, even with all these miracles, the story wasn’t over. Tournament analysts were saying that Penn State likely still needed one win in the Big Ten Tournament to secure a spot in the NCAA Tournament. For those that don’t know, at the end of each season, every team plays in their conference tournament. The winner of each conference tournament is guaranteed a spot in the NCAA Tournament. But even for teams that do not win the conference tournament, the extra games offer a chance to bolster your resume for an at-large bid into the dance.
And this is where things really got different. Because Penn State just kept winning. First they beat Illinois in a close game. Then they beat Northwestern in overtime again. Then they beat Indiana. Then, in the Big Ten Championship game, they took on number 1 ranked Purdue. They were down by 17 late in the second half, made an improbable comeback and ended up only losing by 2. Even with the loss, they proved they can beat anyone in the country.
And now, just a few moments ago
I know that this time will be different than 12 years ago. No, I can’t guarantee that Penn State will win a game. But I can guarantee that I’m going to savor the moment. I’m going to savor the moment where I pencil Penn State in all the way across my bracket to the National Championship. I’m going to savor the opening tip, the atmosphere, and the quintessential music that interludes the commercial breaks.
But most of all, I’m going to savor the hope. Because when your team gets called on Selection Sunday, you get the gift of hope. You get to believe in the miracles of March. The same miracles that propelled UMBC over UVA, powered Loyola Chicago to the Final Four, and forced in countless game-winning shots at the buzzer.
And right now, Penn State sits just 6 miracles away. Six consecutive wins and we are National Champions. The oddsmakers say we have almost no chance, but in March, it’s not about the odds or statistics; it’s about believing in your team and the magic of the tournament.
I want to close by acknowledging the apparent absurdity of it all. After all, we are simply talking about a basketball team, and in the grand scheme of things, it doesn’t matter. But we all care about things that don’t matter. And I care a lot about this team. Penn State basketball is my madness, and I welcome March with arms.
